Root Cause Analysis on Self Struggles

I've got half an hour to spare and I want to keep my writing momentum so here I am, writing once again.

A few hours earlier while walking to the supermarket, I have seen students, young girls coming home from school most probably and I can't help but notice how these middle schoolers or perhaps 7th or 8th graders are more preppy and fashionable than I am, effortlessly. Here I am frumpy as nuts, my hair on a messy bun, sweater, jeggings and sneakers. In short, I look like a potato.

I am not shaming myself or maybe I am but it's true though. I look like an Idaho potato. You see, I've gone through highschool and college believing I have my own sense of style- obviously that style isn't current. I've always been boyish so to speak until I met my gay bestfriend in 2003 who God bless him introduced me, wait no, made me dress like a young lady that I was back then. I started wearing other pieces of clothing like skirts and cute tops and pretty flat shoes. I could never wear high heels probably because I am fat and heavy but thats another blog post. Hehehe I haven't seen him in a while and with that I turned frumpy again.
I wish I am effortlessly fashionable too.

I know, I know I shouldn't bring myself down like this or why don't I do something about it and the whole nine yards. It's just that I am too lazy. As ugly as that sounds, I am lazy. Lazy to look pretty. Isn't that a thing? Probably not. I sometimes look myself in the mirror and find some spots and lines on my face that weren't there before and I get sad. Or stare at myself in glass windows on trains and tell my self- What happened to you? I should be putting more effort in making myself look pretty or at least presentable to the world. Why did I stopped caring?

Oh well, this is just one of the many self-struggles I face in my adult life. Funny thing is, I know in my mind what to do, the question is why don't I do it? I think I need some root cause analysis.